doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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