Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
