I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
