even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
there is puke in my bra ... again
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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