If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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