i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
