Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
