TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
