It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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