69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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