why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
