I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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