I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
