Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Your cock deserves a montage
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
