Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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