PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
