I heard we made out
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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