Quick, to the slutcave!
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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