Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
