How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
