haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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