I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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