There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
