i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
