come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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