Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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