sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
My penis needs a shock collar
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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