It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
