Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
