this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
