My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize