So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
