another moral hangover. fuck.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
