she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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