the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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