This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
