So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize