Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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