So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Still dying that you shit outside
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
