Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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