Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
