Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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