I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
