She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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