i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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