I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
