Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize