I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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