nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
