For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
